Why renewing our vows is so important to us

I want to help you all understand something. Damian and I were sealed for all eternity in the Spokane temple and the promises we made there are for that duration. However, we also have survived a 13 month separation and we somehow managed to avoid a divorce when all signs pointed in that direction. Our tenth year of marriage becomes a milestone for us because we almost didn't make it 7 years. We want to celebrate our vows made as husband and wife and remember the choices we made when we came back together to put each other first and to take care of each other and to talk out our problems and disagreements instead of letting everything fester. We want to celebrate our marriage. This is in NO way another wedding not at all in fact we chose a tropical setting so we could have a little fun....I want to wear a fun tropical print dress just because with the warmth of Hawaii it would be more comfortable to wear one and Damian will wear a Hawaiian shirt and khakis. We won't have a cake we also won't have flowers unless you count the complimentary Hawaiian leis around our necks which I don't. We will have pictures taken and a DVD made but that is for memory sakes and to share with loved ones at home but we plan on it just being Damian, myself, the officiator who will personalize our vow renewal ceremony and the photographer and of course a beautiful Hawaiian setting. That's it and that's the way we want it.

Things done on a budget

I believe in doing almost everything on a shoe string budget. I really feel that you can get away with spending little money but getting the most out of what you do spend. I would be happy to give a few examples. Damian and I with a lot of creativity and some help from loved ones and friends put on a wedding with little cost. I think we only spent about 2500 and that was for EVERYTHING including the dress, invitations, you name it. We also have had creative wedding anniversary celebrations because we have been broke but I can tell you how wonderful they have turned out. It has just been Damian and I at home cuddling and if we have the money we have gotten a pizza or something but we have never done anything fancy. I don't shop at fancy stores I like to shop at Winco or Walmart and most of my clothes I have gotten from other women. I don't do this things just because we have had almost no money I would do the same even if we were really rich. The same principles apply when we are planning our vacations. Damian and I have a dream of renewing our wedding vows in Hawaii that sounds pretty ambitious until I tell you that actually we can cut the costs quite a lot. For starters we plan on going during the off season when everything is cheaper. We also with the help of the internet found a condo rental that is only 390 dollars for the week that is not bad at all and it has a kitchen so all we have to do is do some simple shopping and the food angle is covered. We found a wonderful package that is quite inclusive for the vow renewal ceremony and it is affordable as well because the wedding planners are also the photographer and a licensed minister so that cuts costs considerably. We still plan on having a dream vacation I can't think of anything better than being alone with my spouse reaffirming our love for one another but I also do plan on spending some money. For example, it has always been my dream to swim with a dolphin and I plan on making that dream a reality on this Hawaii vacation. I just chose to spend my money where it will do the most for me. I don't care if I sleep in a four or five star hotel, I don't care if I eat at a fancy restaurant but what I do care about is fulfilling a dream and making memories and taking photographs of a wonderful time.

Good News at work

I am so grateful that I stuck with my job even when it was frustrating. Yesterday was the best day ever at work. I found out that our hours will be picking up and that we are busy enough now to keep going which is wonderful. I may even be able to get a full 40 hour week soon so that is something to be thankful for. I also have been concerned about my speed and efficiency because I know that they hired too many packagers and that they are still making cuts. I got paired with a tough sorter but she is also good and she really told me some things that have helped me a lot to be faster and better. Yesterday was my fastest day yet and that is good news for me and the other gal I am teamed up with to package. They go by how many boxes you have checked in to shipping for the week and that determines how well you have done. We did great yesterday we got a whole lot done granted they were small but still they got done.

I feel so loved

Today was a good day spent feeling loved with my family. Mom Impett made us all dinner and we spent time together as a family talking and helping mom play a cell phone game. We had cheesecake for desert which was really good and I enjoyed the love and attention from my family as they decided to celebrate and honor my birth. That felt really good because I know that they don't have to do anything for me. All in all it was a good day and if this is a good omen then I will have a good year.

In Laws

Today was a good day spent with Damian's family members we helped Shawn move from the rental house he shared with Dani into Joy's just for the time being until he can get his legs under him. Mom Impett and I went to a melodrama and visited my mom for a little bit that was a positive experience we all had dinner once Shawn had started to settle in and then mom and I went to Walmart where she bought me a present for my birthday and she did give me some tennis shoes that had been just sitting in her closet which I appreciate because I NEEDED them for work. It was a good day and tomorrow will be great too that's when we are all going to mom and dad's for dinner and mom is going to get me a cheesecake. YUM!!! The transition from one family to having two was hard to make but now that I'm used to it we get along great. I feel like I am a daughter and a sister and niece to them and that is a good feeling to be treated like such. We have had our rough times but I don't know of a family who hasn't when they are really truly being honest but the important thing is that we have worked it all out and we stand by each other and support each other. Case in point mom has been taking me to work which has been great but now Shawn and I work the same shifts at work and Joy has allowed him the use of her van so he and I are going to ride together to and from work and that will be good too. He's a good guy I honestly feel like he is the big brother that I hadn't been able to have. He just needs to learn to have better taste in women but maybe that will come along as he spends some time on his own figuring out what he wants. I'm really happy though that we all have been getting along and have learned how to come together as a cohesive family.

Indexing

Today was the start of something awesome and a fulfilling way to spend my time in the evenings instead of just sitting and getting on Facebook. Mom and dad Impett are family history center workers and on the way to work today all mom could talk about was family history indexing which has something to do with helping to transcribe old census records. It sounds complicated but I tried it tonight with mom at the family history center and it actually was pretty good once you get the hang of it. Some of the names are hard to read but you just do your best and most of the time you can make out what it is. I got hooked because tonight I indexed about 101 names with a goal to index about 1000 before the end of this month. Our ward is in a competition with one of the other wards we share the building with so it's all in fun and you know how competitive I can get :D. This was fun and I'm glad mom showed this to me and since I'm on a temporary hiatus from family history right now anyway I can still feel like I am contributing. It's awesome I feel the Lord with me really strongly as I am doing this I feel like I'm on fire and I feel all warm inside and out it's a really good feeling. I'm glad I get to ride with mom every morning to work so I had a chance to hear about this.

Still loving what I do

I still love what I do and I actually am starting to not mind waking up at 5 am to be at work everyday. This may not sound relevant to anyone but let me explain for the last few years I have been known to start a job and then quit it right away I have been employed for almost a month now and I still enjoy my job. I am a packager and while there are still detailed things I still need to learn my job is pretty straight forward. I still enjoy it though although it can be mundane. Like so many other things in life it is what you make it, I work for a great company the people there are really nice and I get to listen to music at work that helps me as I package. Case in point with the nice thing we had to have a 45 minute team meeting yesterday to go over some stuff and Cindy our boss was upset but she didn't show it by yelling and screaming she instead coached us and reminded us how it needs to be done. I am gaining more and more respect for her as a supervisor because of how she manages our entire production floor. I know my job isn't for everyone but I enjoy it and that's all that matters for the first time in years I am gainfully employed am able to pay my bills and even able to save a little for the summer when I am off to go to Education week and do some other things that I want to do. I'm happy and that is what matters and it makes a difference when you love what you are doing.

Next 30 years

My thoughts on 30

My 30th birthday will be in a few days and I'm actually okay with that. Last year on my 29th birthday I was a mess but a lot has changed in a year. For one thing I did a mental house cleaning. I got rid of anything negative in my life including some people that instead of building me up just tore me down. That was hard to do but needed. I remember when 30 was old ancient really but I can say that while I have a lot I still need to learn that I am a little wiser now than back when I was younger. I have always had a knack for making friends even though I am shy I guess that would surprise you how many friends a shy person can make. I also have tried to love everyone around me the problem was that I didn't know how to harness these gifts so I spent time and energy on people who were negative and didn't treat me with the same consideration and respect that I treated them. It came at a price but I learned how to harness these abilities and have focused on people in my life who build me up and who treat me well and in return I focus my love and energy on building them up too. I go into this birthday year happy, loved and at peace because of this I am drama free and that's the way I want it to be. I can simply enjoy the ones that I love and who love me and that's something to celebrate. I learned a few lessons along the way and one of the biggest ones is that it's not the quantity of friends that you have that matters it's the quality even one dear friend worth having is worth more than 100 fair weather friends. I must be blessed beyond measure then because I have many quality friends worth having and I love them and care for them all and the unique richness and experiences that they bring to my life. They all are different and provide something different that is wonderful and diverse and I am so thankful that they are a part of my life.

I need to have faith

I knew when I got hired with my job that the season had not really picked up yet and that we really wouldn't be busy until the end of April that being said I was still shocked when I found out from my boss that she doesn't need me to come in until next week. This was not the news I was hoping for since we had just barely got our bills all caught up but still I have to stick it out and have faith. I was led to this job and it's the best job I have ever had so I feel like I need to just have faith that all will be fine. Luckily for us though it is just a week at Venture where I worked for almost 3 years we would be off for the equivalent of weeks on end during the year and somehow we survived so we can survive this. The good news is all our bills are now caught up and we have food to eat so we can make it a little while longer. It's just frustrating to be home again when all I want is to get out of the house lol but that's okay. We are going to be getting out of the house twice before Tuesday to donate our plasma to help out until my hours get a chance to pick up.

Just some random thoughts

I have had some random thoughts run through my head lately so pardon me but I am going to share them out loud. First of all I am so grateful to still have my job. These last two weeks were my probationary period as I finished my training and my first week without a trainer to help me. I was on pins and needles let me tell you but I learned something I learned that sometimes no news is good news and I must have my job because I was told to come back so I'm okay with that. I love my job I really do it's not for everyone but I love it and that's all that really matters. I am so grateful to be employed and to be able to start earning some money again. I'm also grateful that my anxiety is no longer getting the best of me. I have also been realizing this week how hard it is to care about someone a lot but give them room to make their own choices and decisions but to stand beside them no matter what they decide. I am trying hard not to still be mad at Dani for throwing us all under the bus but she and my brother in law are still married so I need to back off and stay out of it. I also consider my brother in law to be a brother to me we are really close so it's hard for me to stand back and watch him go through this and watch her get his hopes up and stomp on his heart but at the same time I know he needs to do this on his own. I am just trying to listen and be there for support no matter what the outcome is. It's been fun working with him though he is a kick in the pants and he still has a smile and a sense of humor even when he's hurting that's something I can admire. I also have been overcome with awe and amazement at how much Heavenly Father knows and loves each one of us. I learned this over the weekend when my best friend Christina came over. She has been going through a lot lately and she knows how I feel about her. She is like a sister to me there isn't anything I wouldn't do to try and help her or be there for her if I can. However, I also love her enough to respect her space and not pry even when I can sense that something is wrong. Well, we got to talking late Saturday night after Damian went to bed and somehow I started to talk to her about her current situation which she had not told me about at all. She was startled and asked me how I knew and I told her since we are both religious good people that while I didn't know someone who loved her more than even me did and he knew that she needed to hear what he told me to tell her. She cried a little but I could tell that she felt relieved because lately things have not been going well in all parts of her life and she just needed to know that she had been heard and had not been forgotten. I think we all need to feel that way from time to time. I think our bond grew even more if that is at all possible. I also reassured her that Damian and I are back on our own two legs again while she is not even able to be under the same roof as her kids at the moment because she had to live with her aunt where she works and her kids had to stay behind with her mother in law until she can afford to get them their own place. She is close to saving enough but is still a little shy. I really touched her when I let her know that I would be happy to float her the last little bit that she needs and that they could pay me back when they can but until then let me do what I can to help her reunite her family so they can be together and so her husband can have a place to come home too when he comes back from his trucking. I have been helped by many the least I can do is pay it forward and help them. I learned the powerful bonds of friendship, that Heavenly Father loves us and knows what our needs are even when we think we are sinking fast and that if we pay attention he will send a life raft our way we just have to look for it because it can be in many forms even in the form of a dear dear friend or in the kindness of a random stranger.

Through a child's eyes

I was given a wonderful present for Easter and I don't think my sister even knows how much I appreciate it. Damian and I were invited to their house for Easter dinner but since we were already all together at Grandma's house the night before we decided to just go home with them and stay the night. The next morning was when I received my gift. I love my nieces so so much there is nothing that I wouldn't do for them to love them or to protect them. I have never been able to witness Lexus when she discovered her Easter basket. I got to not only see that and the wonder in her eyes as she realized all that was for her but I also got to help hide her eggs in the living room since she is so small still and help her find them. That was the best present of all along with helping to take care of Kaylee. I love my sister for letting me be such a big part of the girls lives. I love them so much. I love watching them grow and the cute things they say and do and how much they love everyone around them. Lexus gives wonderful loving hugs and kisses and I love how her hand reaches for mine and how she is learning to trust that her Auntie will never let anything hurt her. I am loving how Kaylee is learning to smile at me and make faces and noises as she discovers her hands,feet, voice and people and things around her. I had a great day surrounded by people that I love and I got to see Easter through a child's eyes and that was a great gift. I appreciated the practice too as Damian and I are preparing to become foster parents and take this next step in our lives.

I owe I owe so it's off to work I go

I nervously started my new job on Tuesday morning but I can tell you now although I am thrilled it's Friday and that I am off until next Tuesday that I do like what I do, the people I work with and the company that I work for. They all seem really nice and they are eager to help me answer my questions and help me figure out exactly what I am doing. I have new respect for people who package all those school and sports pictures and all the extras that come with it. Let me tell you now that they are not just thrown in there it is work. It's fun though and I do like it. I am glad that I went back there to work. The good news for me is that when I get tired and worn out when it does get busy and I do get overtime I get the summer off and then just when I get bored again and want to go back to work I start up again in the fall and so on. I work Spring and Fall and am off Summer and Winter so I think that will be the perfect job for me.

I have a confession to make

I have a confession to make but before I do let me start at the beginning. I had NO intention to EVER watch Twilight. Shocking I know but let me tell you why. I was going to watch it it looked good but I got fed up with EVERYONE and their dog telling me that I just HAD to watch it. I'm the kind of person that doesn't like that at all I don't like being told what I have to and don't have to do. However, I finally did watch it last night not because someone told me that I had to but because a good friend used logic on me and told me how do I know what I like and don't like if I don't give something a chance. I did last night mom and dad Impett netflixed it and they let us watch it too all they asked is that we drop it in the mailbox today. It was good and the next one is next so that should be good too. I hate it when I'm wrong but I learned something to give something a chance even if you think and are pretty sure that you are going to not like it you just might surprise yourself.