Feeling better

Thanks to all of you for your comments and support they really do mean a lot. I think speaking up and reaching out really helped I was able to have a voice and I was able to vocalize how I felt and that helped a lot to make things better. The encouragement is nice too because to be honest for a moment I thought to myself what am I doing this is crazy. I could be working more I could be doing more but then I had to take a step back and look at the bigger picture. I am taking care of my family by furthering my education. So I'm not only going to stick with it but I am going to go even further I am going to go for my dreams my whole dream not just part of it. That includes not only getting my AA degree but getting my Bachelors of Arts in Education. What kind I have yet to determine as I will pray about that as the time gets closer. What have I learned this week that helped me? One, I'm not alone I reached out to other classmates online who have felt this way too and that helped. My instructor for that class also reached out a hand of encouragement which was really great. I also got encouragement from so many others thank you so much. I know I have to get this degree for myself but words of kindness and support mean so much to keep my momentum going. Two, I learned that I can hang tough I didn't quit I didn't falter even when I felt blah I finished my assignments and I finished them on time. Three, the Lord is mindful of me even during my tough times. One particularly lonely day I found on youtube a video someone posted that was over an hour long of Micheal McLean songs. God bless them I listened and many of them I needed to hear to keep me going. I started off crying and crying and crying some more. Then as I cried it out the tears dried and I was able to really hear the message that I needed to. I felt the Spirit embrace me like a warm hug and I felt better. I also felt better just for letting the tears flow it was cleansing in a way. This will not be an easy journey but now I know more than ever that the Lord wants me to go on this path. He has prepared a way he is mindful of me and he will not let me fail if I do two things, give it my best effort and turn to him when my best effort just isn't enough.