Autism awareness Month

I was reminded today what this month is and it's something near and dear to me because of my husband it's Autism Awareness Month. I will be perfectly honest it has not been roses being married to someone who is on the autism spectrum but every second has been worth it. Autism is a challenge because it has so many varying degrees and symptoms and Damian's has been hard because while it is slight it is there and it affects him. He has had people accuse him of lying and making it up but I have been married to him 11 years this June he is autistic. Let me explain how it works and this is part of his brain chemistry it is part of who he is and how he is wired so don't just tell him he can learn to get over it. Some things he has been trying to and has had some success and some things he can't so we have learned to work with them. He has to have things labeled and in a certain place and he is frantic if they are not. He has to know what is going on at all times and gets upset if his routine and or schedule are interrupted. He has a hard time with social interactions and social ques although he is more verbal than some autistic people are. He is highly intelligent and has the uncanny ability to memorize numbers as well as learn about technology and computers. Just for an instance all his computer knowledge which is in fact quite vast is ALL self taught. He has a hard time understanding how his actions, words etc affect other people although he can understand how they affect him. He has to work slowly and deliberately and he HATES too much noise and or commotion and stimulation it really does upset him. Now that's his limitations and his abilities I would now like to focus on how we have been working with what we have. He has learned to just label the spines of our DVD's with a number so that way we can identify ours and keep track of them but it's not tacky. He also has used this talent to sort things and learn to keep things more neat instead of all over the place. We now go over our day once in the morning and once at night for the next day so he knows what is coming. If things have to change we need to let him know as soon as possible it really upsets him if he doesn't know and you just spring something on him surprises really bother him. We are working with him about what is socially acceptable and that not everyone gets his humor and that he can hurt someone's feelings. We are also working on what is appropriate conversation and what is not. He's making a lot of progress especially since his counselor Kim is an expert with autism she has been a god send in our lives as she has educated the both of us. We now use a loving but firm approach with Damian when he is doing something that is inappropriate and we gently but firmly redirect his behavior in a more positive direction. He and I have developed a code word for when he is being inappropriate so he knows he needs to go another way but is not embarrassed. We also have a code word in place for when he has had enough stimuli and has to leave and we have learned to politely excuse ourselves and let him retreat before he gets frantic. He has been learning to slowly increase his speed but keep his attention to detail and he is working hard getting into a computer school so he can channel all his knowledge into a career that he will love. All in all autism is a challenge and our marriage has not been easy but I love him so much. He is worth it he is worth learning what we can cope with and what we can work with and tweak a little. He is worth standing beside as he learns for himself more about his disorder as he was not educated about it at all growing up he was just tossed aside as if he was worthless. People with autism may walk funny as they like to rock sometimes, they may even talk funny as some are not very verbal but they are all wonderful children of Heavenly Father and they deserve the same love, compassion and understanding as anyone else. It is worth it to get to know them because once you can get them to feel comfortable around you and they let you into their world and they trust you it feels amazing. Damian's child like love and faith is amazing and I feel so honored to know that his heart is mine forever. He makes the challenges and hard times worth it.