Why so bubbly??

I'm not ashamed to express myself or my feelings. So I will give a very honest answer to a question I am asked often. I was asked a very honest question again recently why so bubbly? Why so uplifting and why so cheerful? Well....its really quite simple once you have walked the line to the darker side and almost gave into it like I did you can not tempt that again. Its easier once you have almost given up on life and have given into the darkness to revisit that place. I have to try and stay optimistic because if I don't I go to that dark place eventually and that place terrifies me it is not a pleasant place to go. I accidently went there a few weeks back because I was so emotionally drained and depleted. It was not a pleasant experience. Fortunately for me I have a loving Father in Heaven who saved me from myself and I was not there long. He inspired my husband to immediately comfort me in such a way that I knew did not come from just him. He also sent me a few others who were guided to know just what to do to help. After that experience I know for a certainty that I can not do anything to put myself in that position again. Next time I may not be so fortunate. So if I come across as annoying in my optimism I'm sorry but for me it literally is what saves me from myself. If I let myself dwell on negative things I go quickly back to a dark place. A place where everything is not logical or rational, everything is taken out of context and eventually dark forces try and convince me to end my life's mission before its natural conclusion. I can not have that there is so much I still have left to do so bubbly it is.