Feeling so much better

Since my last post life has been just as chaotic as usual but the difference I am not feeling anxiousness or feelings of hopelessness my experiments have been working. I have realized and been practicing this one simple thing I am not in control of anything or anyone else but me. I can't control what someone else thinks feels does etc but I can control my reaction. I have learned that I only have so much energy and I can use my energy wisely and where it will do the most good or I can use it worrying and trying to change things and situations that I don't have any direct control over. I decided that the time has more than come for me to work smarter not harder. I have given up TOPS for the moment the group not the lifestyle I've been a part of two groups now and have had the same drama that I found at Weight Watchers so what I do now is I still do what I've been doing eating better and making good choices and I still exercise but when I need support I reach out to friends and loved ones. I wish I knew what I weigh though the downfall I don't yet have a scale but that's okay. I don't need the drama weekly just to know what the scale says its just not worth any of it. However I will say this out of my first TOPS group I met a great person who has turned into a wonderful supportive friend so that wasn't a total waste of my time or money. I don't know yet if we will try to find another meeting or not meanwhile we just try and keep doing the smart things at home.